“If people were rain I was a drizzle and she was a hurricane.”  
– John Green, Looking for Alaska 

The hurricane was coming.
 No more wondering, no more warning.

Grabbing the tools to put up the ply, 
I began to work, an eye on the sky
Nail after nail, I secured what was mine, 
my loose ends are bound with white twine
Wind tugs my sweaty hair now, 
as horizontal drops begin to pound
Forgetting one thing in all the hurry, 
the open front door in rain now blurry
Rampaging through my unprotected gate, 
the raging storm expresses all of it’s hate
It’s all over with damage everywhere, 
all of my belongings strewn around there

I could have prevented this wind that blew, 
had I stopped myself from loving you



My Chained Love – The neurosis of hanging on

“The scariest thought in the world is that someday I’ll wake up and realize I’ve been sleepwalking through my life: under-appreciating the people I love, making the same hurtful mistakes over and over, a slave to neuroses, fear, and the habitual.” 

I carry my chain with me where ever I go. It’s a pretty chain. At least everyone thinks it should be. I take it in my hands and play with it unconsciously. I catch myself looking at it when I pass a mirror, or in a reflection on the glass. At times it chokes me, when I sleep it tangles itself around my neck and irritates me. I’m worried it will break and I’ll lose it, or someone will want it more than me and take it from me. I’ve had this chain for many years. I’d give it away, but I thought I’d miss having it. It scared me to think of the loss I would feel,  not being able to play with it, or for it to catch my eye. I don’t think a new chain would be as good, after all, how can you replace the years I’ve invested in taking care of this one? I’ll probably die with it after all….


Hear to Listen

“It’s like Sheriff Daniels sneezed, and they all caught the misinformation flu.” – Joe Schreiber, The Unholy Cause


 I will misunderstand the first story I hear. Things start to come into focus only after those initial reports. Observation of the facts is required as a rule of engagement for addressing my information and that requires careful listening, recognizing that I prejudice those things with my experiences of the past. My brain is quick to fill in the missing pieces of information, I compare it to my vision,  I’m quick to recognize a word with missing letters. This phenomenon is discussed in a Cambridge University study on cognition, I fill in the blanks and arrange the information according to my experience. To understand a story correctly requires time and listening for the missing letters.” When I feel inclined to jump to conclusions based on the first story, I’ll wait and look before I leap.