Tag: #paranoia
Diary of a Mad Man – Living with mental illness
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They said to me, “Walk!”. My feet wouldn’t move, frozen by the accident. Appendages that are normally useful, mobile, and independent, I drag them along, taking care that I don’t injure them. The accident, as I call it, was not an accident, but a purposeful intended act, inspired by lust and hate. What they did to me I cannot tell, the acts so horrific. Regardless of the details of their brutal incursion, what I was left with is a handicap, one of the mind, not the body. Having to make do with a shredded normality, crawling through my life, instead of walking, never able to run. What was taken for granted, now became a challenge for me. While others run, leap, climb, and move about with impunity to mental mobility. I must develop new ways, ways that hurt, ways that require intense concentration, intense discipline. Still they taunt me, “get up and walk”, “why can’t you just be like the rest of us”. They can’t see I’m disabled, bound by forces that were neither chosen, nor desired, but forced on me in a cruel and harsh manner.
Seven Faults Of Foolishness – Fault #1 A Proud Look
- “Deep is the sea, and deep is hell, but Pride, mineth deeper;
- It is coiled as a poisonous worm about the foundations of the soul.”
- – Martin Farquhar Tupper, Proverbial Philosophy
A foolish man, devoid of wisdom, thinks nothing of others. Not recognizing that his station in life is carried on the backs of those before him, he lifts up his head and treats with disdain those who are under him. Despising authority, he believes himself to be greater than those beneath and above him, than the common and the exalted. His eyes are haughty, his face hardened to those weaker souls that surround him. He won’t give in to cries for mercy, nor will he allow himself to entertain the causes of those who he’s crushed with his wanton lifestyle. None can approach him, he is the center of his universe, his Ego holding the scepter and reigning supreme in the world that he believes is his. He is God in his own world, a legend in his own mind. See him, as he pushes through the crowd, refusing to give way, he bumps and shoves those who are in “his” way, refusing to yield even for an instant. Staring deep into the eyes of those around him, he hopes to intimidate and force to yield those who oppose him, even though opposition is the least of their motives. He believes that everyone will try to usurp his authority, paranoia quickly taking the reigns of his mind, causing him to be cruel in his decisions.
Seven Faults Of Foolishness – Fault #1 A Proud Look
- “Deep is the sea, and deep is hell, but Pride, mineth deeper;
- It is coiled as a poisonous worm about the foundations of the soul.”
- – Martin Farquhar Tupper, Proverbial Philosophy
A foolish man, devoid of wisdom, thinks nothing of others. Not recognizing that his station in life is carried on the backs of those before him, he lifts up his head and treats with disdain those who are under him. Despising authority, he believes himself to be greater than those beneath and above him, than the common and the exalted. His eyes are haughty, his face hardened to those weaker souls that surround him. He won’t give in to cries for mercy, nor will he allow himself to entertain the causes of those who he’s crushed with his wanton lifestyle. None can approach him, he is the center of his universe, his Ego holding the scepter and reigning supreme in the world that he believes is his. He is God in his own world, a legend in his own mind. See him, as he pushes through the crowd, refusing to give way, he bumps and shoves those who are in “his” way, refusing to yield even for an instant. Staring deep into the eyes of those around him, he hopes to intimidate and force to yield those who oppose him, even though opposition is the least of their motives. He believes that everyone will try to usurp his authority, paranoia quickly taking the reigns of his mind, causing him to be cruel in his decisions.
Crackhead – A day in the life
At War With Me – Inside the mind of schizophrenia
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Alone again, sitting on the edge of shattered dreams
Is this me or we?