Internal Dialogue

“Inside it felt like the hardest thing in the world. To just let go, and not pick everything to death. To just let go and enjoy what you had. To just let go and not make everybody around you miserable with your own internal dialogue. To just let go and be happy. So simple. So difficult. So terrifying.” – Laurell K. Hamilton

 

annacastrolima
annacastrolima

 

The blind call the shots, when what’s heard isn’t seen
When I deal with me, it’s never what it seems
Though sight’s not given, still I judge the call
Crazy as it seems, when I can’t see at all

Medicating the pain, shown by blood not red
hoping to numb a shitty feeling, living in my head
Hoping desperately to find, a happy trail this way
Depression makes it hard, to get out of bed today

The movies are seen, and replayed with renewed vigor
Forever playing with, and pulling the hair trigger
Conversations bad when, the mirror won’t talk back
Only one side of me, carries on the attack

I want to sing and not cry, to take me through this time
The song I settle on, isn’t a lullaby
The mirror shuns the man and tears blur the day
The end of life it seems, points to a better way

Levity –

“The certain prospect of death could sweeten every life with a precious and fragrant drop of levity.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche
angel-in-the-wind
Passing around hard thoughts,
Skipping through rough consequences
Rebuking the threats that abound
A break deserved brought about by
my sweet Levity.
The feasts are prepared,
a peaceful interlude is granted
smiles endure and the future ignored
an intermission paid in full by
my sweet Levity.
All memories are her ethereal songs,
Sweet lullabies sung before the never setting sun
Her persistent touch rocking the cradle
New life borne in light by
my sweet Levity.
First published in Opinionsofeye.com

The Pines – A breeze in the pines

“To me a lush carpet of pine needles or spongy grass is more welcome than the most luxurious Persian rug.” – Helen Keller 
Remember, the storm is a good opportunity for the pine and the cypress to show their strength and their stability.” – Ho Chi Minh
 

I hear the pine needles whispering their lullaby

to me their silent infant

Soft are the blankets laid down by so great a choir

Finding myself in their comforting bosom

My eyes close, resting in natures embrace

This entrancement such a pleasure,

the ancient care of God’s nursemaids.

The Pines – A breeze in the pines

“To me a lush carpet of pine needles or spongy grass is more welcome than the most luxurious Persian rug.” – Helen Keller 
Remember, the storm is a good opportunity for the pine and the cypress to show their strength and their stability.” – Ho Chi Minh
 

I hear the pine needles whispering their lullaby

to me their silent infant

Soft are the blankets laid down by so great a choir

Finding myself in their comforting bosom

My eyes close, resting in natures embrace

This entrancement such a pleasure,

the ancient care of God’s nursemaids.