Echo of Woods – Missing parts of me

“Their screams would echo through the house and reverberate against my eardrums until my mind would fracture. Years went by and with each fracture; I lost a piece of my soul until I became lost and empty inside.”
J.D. Stroube, Caged in Darkness
am-ende-2punkt0
My lover, you followed me on lost paths, chasing my longings deeper, before I turned and saw, you’re not there. The pieces I broke off to mark my exit you ate and then flew away, without any words, disappearing in hollows of echoing woods. I know my soul’s alone by the absence of those missing pieces. How can they be gone, slipped into an eternity of forgetfulness, or thoughtlessness, pushed there by denial and an intense effort to pretend you didn’t happen, unless they were born at sometime in the messy afterbirth of a mind gone mad? If I let my thoughts take these updrafts of imagination, to soar above this wilderness of lore, I’ll see you again. The pain’s breathtaking, should I plunge back below to the feigned wellness of peace? Or perhaps, stay on these heated gestures of reaching and slip into the coldness of space losing the oxygen of you, and with tears and reluctant release my light will dim and finally extinguish.

06262013
 
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Blur –

 “Our time together was a blur—not because I was drunk, which I was, but because our love was like the beating of a hummingbird’s wings.
”
Jarod Kintz, My love can only occupy one person at a time
wikipedia
Bodies finding their way back to earth,
goaded on by the great Shepard age.
Flocks of words begging to forgive,
left wandering amidst endless space.
Loving souls are cracked forever,
scars litter the way to this.
History is written with permanence,
by blue flames this ink will fade.
You can’t see the endless stars,
with blinding tears in your eyes.
With a short goodbye they blur,
The beauty missed carried on by one.
First Published in Opinions Of Eye

Rings and Tears –

 “Sometimes you think you’ve found love, when it’s really just one of those objects that are shiny in a certain light–a trophy, say, or a ring, or a diamond, even. Glass shards, maybe. You’ve got to be careful, you do. The shine can blind you.” 
 
relghamry
I gave you gold and diamond rings
I know that their just pretty things
But behind the glitter and the gleam
they meant more to me than to you it seemed
Being willing to hold you forever
I showed you a tender glimmer
Lights shining on rings your holding
They were only rings you told me
(tears)
nothing less, nothing more
(tears) First published in Opinionsofeye.com

06052013

Exception –

“I cannot be bound to the confines of your rules. I am the exception to them.”
Truth Devour, Wantin  
 “Exceptions are not proof of the old rule; they can also be a harbinger of a new one.”
jennifer-sixx

We were together for years it seems

but those days are just part of a dream

 
 
Heaven sent but hell bound
 
for my blood scent a female hound
 
 
 
Things left a confusing scene
 
broken scars all part of the sheen
 
Your memory still at midnight prevails
for all that is wrong, it still leaves trails
 
No more tears, their long gone
buried in the shadows of woman’s song
When the afternoon’s sun turns to nights wrath, I’m left with nothing. But God.
There is way that seems right to man, in my broken mind it’s a fallacy. But God.
Lust consumes and passions lead on into the gray of a twilight future. But God.
In vain chasing the white clouds that bring relief from this insanity. But God.
But even the high stacks of fortune’s thievery leave me alone. But God.
No way out of this green mile of hell’s gauntlet, cheered on by devils. But God.
In the desperate flames, drums of throbbing nights beat my soul. But God.
But God
will destroy contradiction
will make a way of escape
will break sadness with a smile
will set the solitary in a family. 

 

First published in Opinionsofeye.com

10192013

 

Fulcrum –

“There is darkness inside all of us, though mine is more dangerous than most. Still, we all have it—that part of our soul that is irreparably damaged by the very trials and tribulations of life. We are what we are because of it, or perhaps in spite of it. Some use it as a shield to hide behind, others as an excuse to do unconscionable things. But, truly, the darkness is simply a piece of the whole, neither good nor evil unless you make it so.” ― Jenna Maclaine, Bound By Sin
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petitecem
Building my life on this fulcrum, everything I have hangs the precarious balance of needing you and needing to get away from you. Tainted is the air I breath and colored is the pain I have with the odorous stain of you. Pride bends low in wet mornings on foundation decks with those whose pain I’ve far surpassed. They’re hardened, unable to feel the pain anymore, as for me, I just got here, not so long ago, when the crucible of your hot irons scalded me into blind submission to you. I called my mother and asked her when the pain would stop, it’s been years since I’ve seen you. Yet, it’s like an hour ago I nursed the burns and savored the pleasure of you. Songs on the radio bring tears to my eyes, every sweet moment of tenderness I glimpse between lovers brings a knot to my throat, a wrenching in my gut, and a fresh trail of moist sorrow from my eyes that runs down my neck and seeps under my shirt. In the routine of living, where mourning was a stranger, are found new altars of sadness. Shaking from holding back the tears, the doctor says he can’t get the MRI to take a good picture. I’m partying with good friends, but I’m hollow, so I go outside for some fresh air and to shed more drops of missing you. They say, “Quit your whining. Jesus, everyone goes through shit!”, but you know, sometimes the shit just gets to be too much, too often, and too long. I’d not be the first strong one to break under the pressure of love gone wrong. I won’t break and to live isn’t hard, but to love you and love another is the tortuous path ahead of me and a balance I must achieve.
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Also published in Broowaha
First published in Opinionsofeye.com

 

Love is a Tyrant

The following is an article by a talented writer, SZU. ” Love’s not a tyrant; lovers are; My heart’s a proof-with its shining scars.” Enjoy.

Recently an active exchange of poetic responses began between a friend and I. He wrote this beautiful one and sent it my way…and that’s how it began


When storms have raged and passed away
Can gentle calm succeed?
I sleep to ease a troubled mind
Sleep is the friend
that I need…
With these few words I speak my mind
You in this, a quest will find
My quest is clear…seek it out
Love is a tyrant…when in doubt

I got an instant inspiration; and i wrote down the following words in response:

This storm is here for eternity,
N
o trace of calmness can I see…
No sleep, no rest can soothe my mind
No friend can bring me glee…
This unending quest kills me everyday,
I can’t reach where I want to be…
This doubt can be tyrant I know,
Still this love shall be a part of me…

We appreciated each other’s work and then obviously forgot about it. And just today when I was having my lunch; I got another set of couplets from him in response to what I wrote a week back:

Your storm once raged and passed away,
And the gentle calm did succeed
You slept and eased a troubled mind
Yet now sleep is the friend I need
In those few words you spoke your mind…
…and yet I was so lost, dumb and blind…
Your love’s still a tyrant, there’s no doubt
I’m lost and confused; my soul wants out…

So I just decided to post all the three poems on my blog. But as i am typing here; I can sense the birth of yet another response to his (above written)poem…here it goes..

Why live in the memories of that storm?
That was
a reality once…but now its gone…
And why depend on a gentle calm?
And why not make your wounds, you
r balm?
Sleep- if dreams are where you belong…
Sleep – if that fake world makes you strong!
Don’t be lost,
because they won’t find you
Don’t think much
because those thoughts might blind you…
Love’s not tyrant; lovers are;
My heart’s a proof – with its shining scars.

Also published in Broowaha 
Also published in Opinionsofeye.com

09242014

The One –

“You are not the world, but you are everything that makes the world good.”
Kiera Cass, The One

I feel them all, touching, grabbing, holding
So why you? Your tongue, your caress
I feel them all, pulling, forcing, trying
So why you? Your eyes, your touch
I feel them all, flicking, tricking, maneuvering
So why you? Your breath, your sigh
I feel you all, holding, pushing, exciting
So why you?, your tingle, your rush?
I’ve seen broken, I’ve seen distressed
So why you? Your peace, your calm
I’ve seen heartache, I’ve seen pain
So why you? Your peaceful easy feeling?
I’ve seen desperation, I’ve seen panic
So why you? Your gentle, your easy
I’ve seen disgust, I’ve seen chaotic
So why you? Your taste, your violation?
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First published in Opinions Of Eye.com